some folks have highfalutin' muses but me i gots iMPS in my iNKWeLL. one day satan (who, erm, speaks to me in my left ear all friendly-like) sez to me he sez--
"my dear calamity, you have all these wicked thoughts, all these weird visions, all these various and sundry means at your disposal to make an obscenely ridiculous zine by which you can highlight the creative werks of writers, artists, madmen, bitches and the like, as well as your own fulsome thoughts. you really ought to lance your grey matter and let it spill in attractive puddles on the page. why? just for the hell of it. because you can, my dear. because it might piss people off. because you'll be opening the door to a world of vexation and delirium. because i'm telling you to, calamitous gurl, and you know your old friend satan would never steer you wrong."
so i thinks it over some, and i consults with my angel who rumbles around in my guts, just below my fourth rib on the right side. she sez to me she sez--
well, she doesn't say a dang-blamed thing but just ups and smiles with all her teeth.
so i think on it some more, just enough to start burning some cells off and i suppose i could've thunk and thunk till the cows came home thinkin' of how i shouldn't and oughtn't and how i don't know nuthin' about it... but i burned off so much sweetness and sense in all my thinkin', that all that was left in the brain-pan was some sour vinegar and a sprig of sass so i sez to myself i sez--
"by gawd, calamity jewelz--DO IT!"
and all the iMPS in my iNKY heart chortled and squirmed and snorfled "huzzah!"
so i ups and starts soliciting (heh) poetry and prose and stories and essays and comix and artwerks and oddities and the like and gets me some eye-hurtin' paper and truck on down to the local copy shop and that's how iMPS iN THe iNKWeLL, the wee zine of devilish design wuz born.
and me my name is calamity jewelz and i'm the editrix. pleasetameetcha.
iMPS iN THe iNKWeLL * P.O. Box 6724 * Minneapolis MN 55406 * $2.00/trade
jewel@gleeful.com
a seraph production
hellespont publications